


the tomato fic

by phanironically



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-22
Updated: 2015-08-22
Packaged: 2018-04-16 17:01:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4633140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phanironically/pseuds/phanironically
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>it's exactly what it sounds like</p>
            </blockquote>





	the tomato fic

**Author's Note:**

> in memory of the tomatoes lost in the great twitter tomato war of 2015  
> thanks so much to cait (@canonphan) and adam (@avidhowell) for helping me with plot and editing

“Daaan,” Phil called to his flatmate from their kitchen.

“Could you come here for a second?” Phil was busy preparing dinner for the both of them, while Dan sat in the lounge scrolling through tumblr. Dan forced himself up from his comfortable position on the sofa to join his boyfriend in the kitchen.

“Are we having salad tonight?” Dan asked as he peered over Phil’s shoulder to see him chopping up some lettuce.

“Yeah, could you help me and get some other stuff to put into the salad, there should be cucumbers and bell peppers in the fridge,” Phil said as he threw a handful of lettuce into a large bowl.

Dan opened the fridge in search of various salad ingredients. He grabbed the cucumber and bell peppers Phil had mentioned. He scanned the fridge for some salad dressing but his eyes landed upon something else. Tucked away in the very back of the fridge was a bag of big, red tomatoes. Dan reached his arm in and pulled out the bunch of tomatoes.

“Hey Phil! I found some tomatoes we can put in the salad too!” Dan said eagerly to his boyfriend.

Phil quietly gasped at the mention of the word. His body went completely stiff as his mind began to race.

 _Shit shit shit, no not those_ he thought, beginning to panic. There was a reason Phil kept the tomatoes hidden at the back of the fridge. He had never told anyone about his weird tomato fetish before. It was so embarrassing, but Phil just couldn’t seem to control himself around tomatoes. Just the thought of those shiny, plump, red fruits got him so turned on. Dan put the bag of tomatoes down on the counter next to his boyfriend. Phil sharply sucked in a breath as he caught sight of them. They were the most perfectly ripe tomatoes he’d ever seen. They just looked so red and juicy, he could feel himself getting hard already.

“Wait Dan,” Phil choked out. “Could we not put those in the salad?”

“Why not? I love tomatoes!” Dan replied.

Phil sucked in another breath when Dan said the word again. He could feel the bulge in his jeans getting bigger. He had to think of an excuse.

“I don’t like tomatoes though.” Phil struggled to say. He could feel sweat starting to form on his forehead, as his mind was filled only with thoughts of tomatoes.

“That’s bullshit Phil, you’re the one who bought them,” Dan laughed. “Now stop being weird and cut up those tomatoes.”

“No Dan, I really just don’t want tomatoes.” Phil said in a frustrated voice.

Dan gave him a strange look.

“You know what, fine, I’ll slice them myself.”

Dan grabbed the tomatoes and turned on the faucet. He began rinsing off each tomato before placing them on the cutting board next to Phil. Phil tried his hardest not to stare at Dan’s hands delicately caressing each tomato under the running water, but it was so hot to look at. The bulge in Phil’s pants was growing more noticeable now. Dan finished washing the last tomato and then proceeded to begin cutting them up. He cut the first tomato in half and Phil’s eyes went wide. Why was this so arousing for him? He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding as he watched Dan slice the tomato into quarters. Dan looked up and noticed Phil staring intently at the tomato he was handling.

“Is there something wrong, Phil?” Dan asked.

“What?” Phil snapped out of his trance at Dan’s voice. “Oh! No, nothing’s wrong.”

“Am I cutting the tomatoes wrong?” said Dan with a strange look on his face.

“No! No! It’s just I- uh- nevermind.” Phil said nervously before quickly turning his attention towards the bowl of lettuce in front of him. Dan looked at Phil with a confused expression on his face for a minute before returning to the tomatoes. Dan grabbed the next tomato and cut it in half. Phil stared again, out of the corner of his eyes this time, as his boyfriend carefully sliced the tomatoes. As Dan made another smooth cut into the tomato, Phil accidentally let a moan slip out. Dan stopped and looked up at Phil, who tried his best to act natural.

“Phil, did you just moan?” Dan asked.

“What? No! Why would I do that?” Phil replied a little too quickly, his voice breaking a bit. Dan gave him another funny look. Suddenly, he glanced down and saw the huge bulge in Phil’s jeans.

“Oh my God, are you hard right now?” Dan chuckled as he put down his knife, “Seriously? We’re just about to have dinner.”

“I can’t help it! I just—” Phil swallowed, looking down and the red fruits on the counter. Dan followed his gaze and realize he was concentrated on the tomatoes.

“Phil…” Dan said, “Are you getting turned on by those tomatoes?”

“No! Don’t be ridiculous, Dan! That’s just weird—”

Before Phil could say anything else, Dan quickly picked up a whole tomato and smushed it all over Phil’s face. Phil gasped before moaning loudly, as Dan rubbed the juices all over his face. Phil’s knees became weak and he felt his cock pressing against his jeans, begging to be touched. He tried to restrain himself but he couldn’t stand it any longer. Phil grabbed Dan by the hips and pulled them together, kissing him roughly and pinning him to the counter.

Dan hesitated before he began to kiss back.

“Now I see why you didn’t want to have tomatoes.” Dan whispered when he stopped to catch his breath.

Phil pulled back and they both looked at each other. They had squished tomato all over their faces.

“You look so good right now, Dan.” Phil said with a smirk, staring intently at his tomato covered boyfriend.

Dan saw how turned on Phil was and he thought this whole situation was so fucked up but he decided to go along with it anyways. Phil had let Dan experiment with some of his kinks in the past, so this would be Phil’s turn. Dan reached over to the counter and grabbed another tomato.

“Why don’t you show me how much you love tomatoes?” Dan said holding out the tomato to Phil.

Phil paused for a second before snatching the tomato from Dan’s hand and taking a huge bite of it. He grabbed Dan’s shoulders and pressed their lips together. They kissed passionately, exchanging the tomato bits between their mouths. Dan could feel himself getting hard now too. He moved his hips forward to meet Phil’s, causing his boyfriend to moan.

Phil stopped and lifted Dan’s shirt up over his head and threw it to the side. He grabbed another tomato off of the counter and smashed it against Dan’s chest. Dan gasped, as the tomato was quite cold and the juices were trickling down his sides into his pants. Phil rubbed the smushed tomato all over Dan’s chest and he lowered his head to suck on Dan’s nipples that were covered in tomato guts. Dan moaned and tangled his fingers into Phil’s hair as he licked around his sensitive nipples. Phil lifted his head up and quickly tore off his shirt and began to take off his belt. Dan got onto his knees in front of Phil and helped undo his jeans and slide them down his legs, along with his boxers. Dan grabbed Phil’s dick in his hand and began to stroke him. Phil reached over and took another tomato off of the counter. He took two fingers and stuck them into the tomato, creating a hole going through it. He handed the fruit to Dan who raised his eyebrows in question. Phil nodded in response, looking down at his own dick. Dan smirked before sliding the tomato onto Phil’s hard cock. Phil let out a deep moan as Dan slid the dripping tomato up and down his length. Phil tangled his fingers into Dan’s hair and forced his head down onto his dick. He bit his lip trying to suppress his moans, as the feeling of Dan’s mouth and the juicy tomato was almost too much for him.

Dan reached down with his free hand and started to undo his own pants. Phil pulled his boyfriend off of himself in order to help him remove his jeans and boxers. They were completely naked now, with tomato juice covering their chests. Dan grabbed his own dick and began stroking himself. He looked up at Phil with lust in his eyes.

“Please fuck me, tomato daddy!” Dan whimpered.

Phil shuddered with pleasure at Dan’s words. He took the tomato that was on his cock and shoved it into Dan’s mouth, causing him to choke. He leaned down to kiss his boyfriend again, taking pieces of the tomato into his own mouth and swallowing them.

“Get on your hands and knees.” Phil ordered after breaking away from the kiss.

Dan did as Phil said, getting on all fours, sticking his ass in the air and starting to stretch himself. Phil went over to the counter and grabbed the biggest, sexiest tomato there was. He had special plans for this particular fruit.

“Dan, I’m gonna need you to spread yourself wide open, don’t clench until I say you can.” Phil said as he knelt down behind Dan.

“Okay Phil, I’ll try.” Dan responded. He spread his legs wide and relaxed himself as much as he could.

Phil rubbed the shiny red tomato against Dan’s asshole to tease him. He then began to carefully push the tomato into Dan, trying not to break the delicate fruit. Dan screamed out in pain as the tomato penetrated his asshole, stretching him farther than he’s ever experienced. Phil was pretty huge, but not quite as thick as the width of this tomato. Dan was whimpering with tears running down his cheeks, mixing with the tomato juice that was left there. He knew how much Phil was enjoying this so he tried his best to tough it out. Finally, Phil pushed the tomato all the way into Dan and the pain subsided slightly. Dan let out a moan as he felt the fruit move inside of him.

“You’re doing so well, my little tomato slut,” Phil said. “Do you want me to fuck you now?”

“Yes, Phil please!” Dan begged.

Phil got on his knees and lined himself up with Dan’s hole. He slowly pushed himself in until he felt the tip of his dick touch the tomato inside of Dan. Phil let out a moan and continued to push in further, moving the tomato deeper into his boyfriend’s ass. The tomato rubbed against Dan’s prostate causing him to yell out in pleasure. Phil pulled his hips back and thrusted in again, Dan moaning beneath him. Phil’s thrusts got progressively harder until eventually he slammed in so hard that the tomato burst inside of Dan. They both gasped as they felt the tomato’s juice begin to leak out of Dan’s asshole. Phil resumed fucking Dan, harder this time as to try to mash up the tomato inside of him. Dan reached down and started stroking himself, whimpering every time Phil slammed into his prostate.

“I’m so close Phil.” Dan choked out.

“Me too Dan, come whenever you’re ready.” Phil said, quickening his thrusts.

Dan moved his hand faster and finally reached his climax, screaming out Phil’s name and shooting cum onto the kitchen floor. Phil came inside of Dan shortly afterwards. He pulled out of Dan and immediately brought his mouth to Dan’s entrance to lick up the tomato mush that came dripping out of his hole. He loved the taste of tomatoes, his own cum, and a hint of Dan’s asshole. Just then, he got an idea.

“Wait a second Dan, hold it in for me” Phil said as he stood up.

Dan clenched tightly in an attempt to keep the tomato and Phil’s cum inside of him. Phil got up and reached into one of their cabinets and grabbed a bowl. He knelt down behind Dan and held the bowl underneath his entrance.

“Ok babe, you can let go.” Phil said.

Dan relaxed himself and the juicy tomato/cum mixture came pouring out into the bowl. He let out a deep moan as the mush was emptied out of his asshole. When there was none left, Dan collapsed onto the kitchen floor from exhaustion. Phil took the bowl filled with Dan’s ass tomatoes and stuck it in the fridge to keep it fresh, he would save this for later when he needed to get off.

“Dan you did so well, thank you so much.” Phil whispered to Dan as he picked him up from the floor.

“You’re welcome Phil, I love you.” Dan answered quietly, leaning his head on his boyfriend’s chest.

“I love you too babe, now let’s go take a shower, Cat will be here in a few hours.” Phil said, carrying Dan to the bathroom.

 

***later that evening***

 

“Hey Cat!” Phil said opening the door and welcoming his and Dan’s friend in.

“Phil! It’s so good to see you, it’s been forever,” Cat said walking into the apartment. “Where’s Dan?”

“Oh, he must still be asleep, he was feeling very tired earlier so he decided to take a nap, I’ll go wake him up now though. Help yourself to anything in the kitchen, I’ll be right back.” Phil said before walking down the hall to him and Dan’s shared bedroom.

Phil knocked on the door softly before opening it and letting himself in. He walked over to the bed and sat down next to Dan.

“Daaan, wake up.” Phil whispered as he gently shook Dan awake.

“Mmmm, what Phil?” Dan groaned, rolling onto his side and pulling the covers up over his head.

“Dan, Cat is here, you have to get up.” Phil explained.

“Ugh, I don’t want to deal with Cat today, she can be so annoying.” Dan mumbled.

“I know Dan, I’m sorry, but it’s only until SITC is over. Come on love, get up.” Phil said pulling back the blanket and pressing a small kiss to Dan’s forehead.

Dan smiled and reached up with both hands to catch Phil’s face and bring him down for a real kiss. They pulled away after a few seconds, both of them giggling. Dan finally got out of bed and threw on some sweatpants. He and Phil both made their way back to the lounge where Cat was sitting on the couch.

“Hi Cat” Dan said as he entered the room, Phil right behind him.

“Hey Dan! How was your nap?” Cat asked as she got up to hug Dan.

“Good, thank you.” Dan replied, reciprocating an awkward hug.

Suddenly, Phil let out a small gasp. He began to panic as he saw a certain bowl placed on the table next to a bag of tortilla chips.

“Oh by the way guys, this salsa you made is so good, it tastes really fresh!” Cat said, turning around and reaching down to grab a chip.

Dan looked down at the table and then over to Phil with wide eyes. Phil was staring back at him with the same expression of shock.

 _Is that what I think it is?_ Dan mouthed to Phil while subtly pointing to the bowl.

Phil nodded. Dan had to put his hand over his mouth to stop himself from bursting out with laughter. Phil started to smile as well and had to suppress a giggle. Cat turned back around to face them.

“Did you guys just make this today?” Cat questioned before eating a chip dipped in the tomatoes.

“Uh, yeah, we did!” Phil said a little too quickly.

“Something tastes different about it, but it’s really good!” Cat said, taking another chip.

Dan and Phil looked at each other again and smirked knowingly, silently agreeing not to mention anything to Cat.


End file.
